Origins
by Pira The Sarcastic
Summary: Everybody knows about it when Gary Smith returns to school.


Note: This a prequel/backstory to my ongoing fic The Bully, the Pussy, and the Sociopath. Obviously it's before that though so that story doesn't need to be read in order to understand anything that's going on. I didn't plan to end it where I did but it seemed like such a good stopping point with the last line. How the relationship evolved is probably another oneshot coming.

Everybody knows about it when Gary Smith returns to school. Not that it appeared to be any kind of secret with him just strolling onto school grounds with a suitcase and a probation officer. But it's almost out of the blue that he reappears two months into sophomore year. Nobody was expecting to see him back on Bullworth property this soon after being shipped away to Happy Volts. Certainly not to be readmitted into school like nothing had ever happened. Like he hadn't lost his shit and nearly conquered a private school in a small city in New Hampshire.

There's a lot of gossip in class that day. Gary and the probation officer are in Crabblesnitch's office the entirety of the school day. They know because Christy checks in between classes and reports back to Mandy and Pinky. Everyone knows after that.

All eyes are on Jimmy. They want to know how he's going to react. What he's going to do if the rumors are true and Gary really is coming back to Bullworth as a student. Jimmy doesn't really care about all that though. What he does care about is how sad Pete looks. How fidgety he gets between Christy's check-ins.

After the last period of the day, Jimmy pulls Petey into an unoccupied hallway so that they won't be overheard. The last thing he wants is people adding this to their gossip and assume that they're plotting to jump Gary or some crazy bullshit like that.

"Hey. Are you okay? I know this must be freaky for you, but I know Crabblesnitch will listen if we tell him you can't be around Gary. They'll move him to a different room or something. We'll work it out," Jimmy promises once the hallways have cleared. Petey stares blankly for a moment before he shakes his head.

"I wonder if Gary is okay?" Pete asks, thinking of no other way to explain what he was feeling.

"If Gary is-Petey! Who gives a fuck if Gary is okay? Are you completely forgetting what happened six months ago?" Jimmy demands, holding back the urge to shake the younger boy.

"Exactly, Jimmy! Six months. In Happy Volts, that's a lifetime. Johnny was in the tamer block of Happy Volts last year and he still has nightmares about it. Gary was in block C. Scary stuff happens in block C," Petey insists, eying the entrance to the front office.

"What do you know about what happens at Happy Volts?" Jimmy dismisses.

"When we were in middle school, our history teacher took us on a field trip to Happy Volts. He wasn't suppose to but he was kind of crazy and he snuck us out of the building in the morning after everyone had gone to class. Even the orderlies at Happy Volts were anxious about letting us in but they agreed as long as none of us separated from the group. And only if we stayed in the A and B blocks. He didn't listen though and we eventually ended up in C block," Petey tells him, hugging his arms around himself.

"That's fucked up," Jimmy can't help but say. He doesn't know what else to say. If there is anything else. It sounds exactly like the kind of shit a teacher at Bullworth would pull.

"He got fired obviously but it...just...the screams. They were awful. The inmates in C don't get to walk around because they're all in there for being physically violent so they spend all their time in cells. The orderly who eventually came to get us said that the screaming never stops. That there's always at least a couple inmates screaming at any given time. Jimmy, five minutes of C block is hell. Six months...who knows what six months does to a person," Pete finishes, quieting as they hear voices coming from the office.

"I'm glad we could come to an agreement, Mr. Smith. I'm certain we won't be running into anymore problems from you. Oh no, Mr. Smith, I'd say that you've had all the naughtiness cleansed from you," Crabblesnitch says as the group come into view. There's no reply from Gary and the probation officer puts a hand on his shoulder, causing the boy to flinch before he returns to the same empty stare.

"Come along, Gary. We'll get you set up before I go. You're in the same room as last year. Won't that be nice? Familiarity is always good when it comes to readjusting," the woman suggest softly. Again, Gary doesn't answer and she takes this as a sign to lead the boy out of the building.

Crabblesnitch watches the two go before he notices the boys in the corner.

"You there! Get out, school is over!" the man yells. The boys don't need to be told twice before they're sprinting down the stairs and out of the building. They don't need an excuse to get as far away from the headmaster as possible. "And no running! This is a prestigious school, not a barnyard!"

Boys are crowded around Petey's open door but no one is daring to move any closer. They're all muttering about Bullworth's newest student and Petey feels a surge of distaste at their ability to treat Gary like a zoo animal. Jimmy's not as much of a coward as the rest of the boys though and he has no problem storming into the room to eye Gary sitting on his bed, suitcase untouched on the floor beside him.

"You have a lot of nerve," Jimmy starts.

"We can't do this right now," Gary interrupts him monotonously. Jimmy crosses his arms and raises an eyebrow in challenge. The older boy sounds bored or inconvenienced and Jimmy doesn't feel he has a right to that sort of attitude.

"Oh yeah, and why is that?" he demands. Gary doesn't even have the balls to look at him and that pisses Jimmy off more than anything. Honestly, he's not really sure what Gary's looking at because he has this far off look in his eyes.

"Because I am so fucked up on drugs right now, I won't remember this tomorrow," Gary replies in the same monotone voice. If Jimmy's being honest, this is a lot freakier than when Gary was freaking out from a lack of medication in his system.

"What?" Jimmy says dumbly, not knowing what else to say.

"Drugs. Lots and lots and lots of drugs. Are you going to attempt to beat my head into the pavement? You should do it now. I'm interested to know if I'd feel it or if I'd need the blood to tell me I'm dying," Gary explains, finally looking up to stare blankly at Jimmy.

"Oh...um," Jimmy hums, stalling. This wasn't what he was expecting for his next encounter with Gary. This is kind of pathetic in retrospect.

"Gary?" Petey calls out, feeling small, and Gary turns his attention from Jimmy to Petey suddenly. As if he were shocked and hadn't noticed that Petey was even standing next to Jimmy. Pete is afraid he hadn't.

"You two are boning," Gary accuses, though the accusation sounds more like a calm statement.

"What? Why would you even think that?" Jimmy grumbles, feeling like this situation was slowly spiraling out of control despite the fact that everything appeared very subdued.

"Just a guess. Why not? Wanna give it a try? Seems like a good idea. Nobody else is going to want you two. You're damaged," Gary insists, nodding in agreement to his own statement.

"Excuse me? Fuck you. We're damaged? Have you seen yourself? You're doped out of your mind and reenrolled in a school where everyone hates you. I don't think you have room to talk about damaged, you little bitch," Jimmy hisses, eying Gary up.

"Jimmy," Pete worries, wringing his hands.

"Jimmy," Gary mocks, a sham of his usual mocking imitation of the boy. It's like he can't be bothered to try. There's a possibility that he really can't. The boy seems pretty out of it. "Listen to your boyfriend, Little Petey, and run far far away from the bad, mean sociopath. He's spouting lies and deception and we wouldn't want you to remember how utterly miserable you really are by yourself."

"Stop it, Gary," Petey demands, sounding this close to crying. Jimmy can feel the eyes of the other boys in the dorm. He'd forgotten about them but knows now that they must be putting on a show. Gary smiles and it's not as cruel as his usual smile but it's wrong in it's own way.

"I know why they scream now," is all he says in reply and it's all he needs to say before Petey is running out of the dorm, yelling about how much he hates Gary.

Pete knocks into Gary's probation officer coming back in as he runs out and she watches worriedly as he leaves before turning her attention to her charge.

"What did you do? Are you already causing problems?" she asks seriously.

"You know me. A social butterfly," Gary mumbles, holding his hand out for the paperwork she's holding. She'd gone to retrieve his schedule as well as some agreements he had to sign before he was legally back in the school.

"You have to behave. You take your medication twice a day, at the nurses offices. Once before classes and once before dinner. You don't show up at those times, I get called back. You do and we'll see about lowering the dose and allowing you control of administering them again. Are we clear?" she asks, refusing to hand him the paperwork before he agrees. Gary sighs.

"I'm not going to graduate," he tells her. And he's not even trying to be difficult; it's just a fact. Gary can barely stand with the dosage Happy Volts was forcing in him. Now that he's out, the dose is promised to be much less but two doses a day already tells him what he needs to know. Even when he's free, they're just going to dope him to compliance. It doesn't do well for his ability to achieve anything at school.

"That's not the attitude to have," she chastises him, finally handing him the paperwork.

"Lady, you don't know shit," Gary growls. She merely shakes her head and collects her things. It just shows that she doesn't really care about what happens to him as much as her soft tone suggests. He's just another problem child in the system for her to deal with. Well, that's just fine. He doesn't expect to see her back at any point because he'll take his stupid meds if only to get everyone off his back.

"Twice a day. I don't want to have to make another trip," she reminds him. And then she's gone and Gary's left alone in a building with boys who would love nothing more than to murder him.

"What the fuck happened to you?" Jimmy asks in disgust.

"Don't you know, Hopkins? This is how they deal with problem children," Gary informs him flatly, curling into himself. It's not even dark out but Jimmy can tell that Gary doesn't have any intentions of moving from that spot tonight.

Jimmy meets up with Petey at dinner, who is sitting alone and appears to be deep in thought.

"I'm sorry he upset you so much. I can't believe they put him in the same room as you again," Jimmy sympathizes.

"He's not moving. He's not asleep but he won't say anything. I mean, Gary didn't sleep a lot but usually he'd fidget around or annoy me or sneak out and do something. He's kind of just laying there, Jimmy," Pete worries. Jimmy scoffs in disgust.

"Are you listening to yourself, Pete? You sound concerned for Gary. Gary Smith. The boy who ruined your entire life? Ring any bells, Petey?" Jimmy reminds him.

"Stop it. You don't get it, Jimmy. Gary's been in my life since before I could talk and it hasn't always been good but then suddenly he wasn't. Now that he's back, there's a thousand new things wrong with him and that's not okay, alright? I don't know how to explain it," Pete argues with a sigh. He feels dejected. Nobody else has ever gotten it so he doesn't know why he expects Jimmy to. It'll always seem like Petey's just asking for it.

"I don't understand you, Pete. You're either a better person or stupid," Jimmy admits. Petey looks away in annoyance.

"You can dwell in the past but I'm not going to watch Gary drown," Petey says, crossing his arms. Jimmy sighs and shakes his head.

"Gary doesn't care if he drowns, Pete. You know he just wants to bring you under with him," Jimmy says. Jimmy's not good with friendships. He has mutually benefitting relationships and people he doesn't care about. The only two people he can really say he cares about beyond that are Zoe and Petey. He just wishes Petey would understand that Jimmy's worried for his sake.

"You're wrong. Gary's just never been shown it matters if he drowns," Petey insists and the topic is dropped.

Instead of being targeted like Petey had first feared, it seems as if Gary has gone back to being a social pariah. Nobody talks to him. Nobody acknowledges his existence. It is, Gary muses, just like being back home without the cats and listening to his mother cry at three in the morning. He can't tell if this is a plus or not.

Petey can tell Gary still isn't sleeping. Even before, Gary had a tendency to sleep for very short periods of time with shorter episodes of almost hibernation scattered in between. But now, Gary hasn't slept at all and it's becoming more obvious in his appearance. He always looks this close to passing out which could be partly due to the meds. Gary must be taking them because while he isn't quite in the zombie state he entered the school in, he's pretty damn close. Quiet and subdued in a way that Gary should never be.

Gary's falling behind in school after already being 2 months out of the loop and Petey's scolded every time he tries to help. The other kids give him weird looks and Jimmy keeps asking if he wants to be a social pariah again too. After everything they've worked for. But Petey hasn't worked for anything and nobody's got anything nice to say to him anyway so he keeps trying.

See, the thing is, Petey knows Gary isn't stupid. He's not too great at math but neither is Jimmy or most teenagers in the world. But he's so so smart at history and english is one of his best subjects. Gary used to do homework as much as he used to taunt Petey for how diligent he was on his own. Just because the teachers want nothing to do with the boy now that he's back doesn't mean that Gary's a lost cause. There's already not much for Gary out in the world. He can't let the boy fail high school because he's lost all motivation.

Gary and Petey spend a lot more time together than they ever have in the previous years of knowing each other. They already spent more time with each other than anyone else hung out with them collectively but this has reached a whole new level. The older boy's taken to spending his free time hanging around Petey, not saying anything, justing sitting in his presence. Watching him do homework or watch tv or paint in the dorm. Petey thinks this is probably out of some sort of loneliness. Gary's never liked the kids at Bullworth but he at least conversed with most of them.

"Why aren't you and Jimmy fucking?" Gary asks suddenly one day during dinner. Jimmy had decided to go to town with Zoe for dinner leaving Pete for Gary. Gary's fine with this arrangement as Jimmy spends most of his time in Gary's presence glaring at him. Petey almost chokes on his food.

"What?! Why do you keep bringing that up?" Petey splutters, flustered.

"Twice. Who's he fucking now, then? Zoe or the school?" Gary presses, though he appears bored. Petey can't really tell anymore. There isn't much emotion to his voice these days. The few things he does say always sound bored.

"Mostly the boys. Him and Zoe broke up after the first month last year. Apparently Zoe can't keep it in her pants either and they decided they were better as friends," Petey explains. Gary rolls his eyes and Pete can't help but appreciate this sign that the real Gary is still there.

"What about you?" Gary asks.

"What about me?" Pete shoots back, confused. Petey's the same as he always has been and he's not sure what Gary's trying to get at.

"You two are doing this wrong. How are you suppose to heal as people if you pretend you're normal high school kids?" Gary demands, sounding angry.

"Why are you so concerned about Jimmy and I having sex? And we are normal, okay? There's nothing wrong with us," Petey insists.

"You're right, Petey. Jimmy is all messed up because he came from a broken home," Gary repeats, eyes hardening.

"I never said that!" Petey yells, feeling defensive.

"And god knows my family doesn't come out of any magazine no matter how cookie-cutter my fucking father wants us to be," Gary continues.

"Shut up, Gary!" Petey tries again, sounding more frantic.

"Nobody likes you, Pete! Nobody has liked you since your mother died and nobody is going to like you tomorrow, or next week, or next year. Nobody likes you and it's only a little bit my fault and a lot the fault of the stupid, unfair world!" Gary ignores his tone, raising his voice for the first time since he's gotten back.

"That's not true!" Petey cries, slamming his fists on the table. They've drawn the attention of the cafeteria and Petey feels his cheeks heat up. Stupid, naive Petey. Always running back to Gary. When's he going to learn?

"Yes it is," Gary hisses, "And the sooner you and Jimmy pull your asses out of your head, the sooner I can go kill myself and make everyone a whole lot happier." He storms out of the cafeteria and Petey feels frozen under the weight of the school's eyes.

"You're not really going to kill yourself, right?" Petey asks into the darkness of their room later that night, feeling smaller than he has in a long time. He's met with silence and the sinking of his own stomach in response.

"No. I'm too self-important for that," Gary responds quietly back after a while. Petey doesn't know whether to be relieved or more frightened by that answer.

Gary playing Cupid is a weird thing. He's clearly very invested in getting Pete and Jimmy together but shows a general disinterest in the topic whenever Petey brings it up. It's mostly harmless though and it keeps Gary occupied so Petey can't find a reason to stop him. It does get a little awkward though, the little run ins and Gary leaving with some bullshit excuse anytime he thinks it will get Pete and Jimmy alone without him. Petey is running on the assumption that Gary thinks their relationship will form from a mutual dislike of him. It's too bad Petey doesn't hate Gary.

It gets to the point where Jimmy finally gets over whatever problem he has with Gary and spends more time with the both of them together, more in self defense than friendship. If it means that Petey will stop looking so overwhelmed while Gary trails silently after him around school like a lost puppy, Jimmy'll sacrifice that little bit of his image.

Gary starts talking more after that. Mostly still about Jimmy and Petey hooking up but also about other things. Normal teenage things like video games and the general going-ons of the school. When it comes down to it, Gary and Jimmy are giant gossips. Sometimes when Gary laughs at something Jimmy's said, an honest laugh of amusement, Petey can pretend like nothing's wrong. Like Gary doesn't spend every waking moment on more medication than his body can fully handle.

Until one day, Gary isn't on that much medication. It's a little after a month since Gary's returned when his probation officer shows up again. Gary looks unhappy and demands to know what he's done wrong which Petey doesn't blame him for because she shows up inappropriately in the middle of history. Petey doesn't find this very professional of her.

"We need to talk," she says cryptically, sending a questioning look at Mr. Wiggins. But really, he can't turn her down, can he? She's already made a disruption of herself. It'd be stupid to stop her. So she pulls Gary into the hallway.

Pete shoots a worried glance at the door, turning to Jimmy to ask if he had any idea what this could be about. He's stopped though when he realizes that instead of looking at him, Jimmy is also looking at the door with a slightly worried look.

"He spends all his time around us, what could he have done?" Jimmy wonders aloud.

They don't find out until later because Gary spends the rest of class with his probation worker. It's not until Gary comes bursting into his room where Jimmy and Petey are talking that they discover why she had been called back to the school.

"I get to go back on one dose!" he shouts excitedly, catapulting himself onto the bed with them. Petey bounces in excitement and launches himself at Gary.

"That's awesome! Congratulations," Petey says and Gary nods happily. He can't remember the last time he felt this happy over anything much less anything regarding his medication. For the first time in a long time, Gary actually believes he might be able to move forward from this point. His grades have picked up back to where they were with little a consequence to his GPA and he's got at least two people willing to talk to him on a daily basis.

Even the other kids have started to revert to their old way of treating Gary. Not exactly pleasant. Nobody likes him which is fine because nobody really liked him last year either. But he has conversations with kids he doesn't mind talking to and he has fairly regular interactions with the kids he does mind talking to. He'd say things are back to normal with the addition of Zoe into the mix. He figures it has a lot to do with Jimmy's eventual agreement to associate with him again.

Gary is still grinning when Jimmy finally decides to comment.

"How long do you think that's going to last?" he asks seriously with his arms crossed.

Everything in Gary falls apart at that question. Because really, who is he kidding? Nothing is different and this is just a detour on the way to his life being complete and utter bullshit. And the worst part is he can't even find someone else to blame this time.

"Jimmy!" Petey growls, upset that Jimmy would even think to ruin this moment for Gary. The older boy had been doing so good! He'd gotten his grades up and he'd taken his overabundance of meds without much of a complaint. Petey can tell too that Gary is much happier when he's spending time with them. Left alone, Gary looks nothing short of miserable. The older boy may hate people but he doesn't handle being ostracized well at all.

"What? I'm just being realistic! He's going to fuck it up at some point. He's Gary," Jimmy argues, motioning at Gary. He can't be the only one who still sees what's really going on. Gary's not getting better; he's experiencing one part of an endless cycle he'll be stuck in his entire life. Be drugged, be slightly less drugged, freak out, be incarcerated, repeat.

"I interrupted something. I'm going to leave. I'll be somewhere outside," Gary mumbles, reverting to his old habits of leaving Jimmy and Pete alone.

"Look what you did, you asshole! You hurt his feelings!" Petey yells, shoving Jimmy. Jimmy grabs his shoulders roughly and holds him still.

"FUCK his feelings, Petey! What about your feelings? Do you even care about how you're going to get hurt in all of this? Gary is a sociopath, Pete. He doesn't love you. He doesn't even like you. But I care about you and I'm not going to sit back while you stupidly fall back into Gary's lap!" Jimmy yells back, shaking Pete as softly as he can. He just wants the younger boy to open his eyes. Petey shakes free of Jimmy's grip.

"You're just scared," he hisses in Jimmy's face before sprinting after Gary. Jimmy sits in the miserable silence of the room wondering when things got to this point.

Petey finds Gary pacing by the football field. He's clearly agitated beyond what his medication had previously allowed him to be. Part of Petey is glad for this. He wants Gary back even if the Gary he wants back is ten times more horrible to him than this one.

"You're mine! You're mine, you're mine, YOU'RE MINE!" Gary screams at him when he notices Pete staring. Petey looks around worriedly. Nobody's out here right now but he's pretty sure this could be considered enough of an episode to send Gary right back to his original dosage. Gary stalks up to Pete and shoves him, pretty damn hard actually, and Petey stumbles back. He's scared; a little for himself and a lot for Gary. "I love you," Gary says a little hysterically.

"Why?" Petey asks, refusing to cower from Gary when he corners Petey into a wall. Gary scoffs. He knew, he knew Pete would needs specifics. He didn't even think he was capable of feeling this way about people and Pete wants to know why. Pete's not going to hear anything he likes if Gary explains. Gary pulls away and starts pacing again.

"Because you're mine. You're mine because I deemed you important enough to have," Gary growls, holding in the urge to punch something. The only one here is Petey and he doesn't want to take his anger out on Pete. Not today.

"What about Jimmy?" Petey asks, staying in his spot against the brick wall.

"Jimmy too! But that's different because Hopkins hates me and you don't. You don't hate me Petey because you're a god damn idiot and I hate you," Gary insists.

"Thought you loved me?" Petey wheedles, pushing himself off the wall and walking over to stop Gary's pacing. He grabs Gary's wrist and tugs the other boy towards him. It's not enough to actually force Gary to move but he does regardless, turning to face Pete.

"It's the same feeling," Gary says, staring hard at Petey before he smiles. Petey smiles back and threads his fingers between Gary's.

"Okay. Okay, we can work with this," Petey promises.

"I am not going on a date with Gary Smith!" Jimmy yells at him later when Petey suggests an outing to test the footing.

"You are. And so am I and it's going to be awesome," Petey chirps, in the middle of changing for said date.

"I wouldn't use the word awesome," Gary grumbles from the other side of the room where he's stripping off his shirt. Jimmy goes to snark at him when he notices the large and ugly bruise on Gary's back. It's been six months and Jimmy's own injuries have healed. Gary's looks like it hasn't even tried.

"Jesus christ!" he hisses sympathetically, walking over to trace a finger from the top of the bruise at the base of Gary's neck down to the bottom by his tailbone. Gary shows no sign that it hurts and the only acknowledgment he gets at all is the twitch of muscle under Jimmy's touch.

"Bruises are a reminder of why you're there," is Gary's only response before he's tugging on a new shirt. Jimmy is silent for a moment and Gary stays stiffly turned with his back to Jimmy despite that fact that he's finished changing.

"Okay, where are we going?" Jimmy asks, turning to Petey who rewards him with a bright smile.

They decide to just stick to a diner in town instead of anything big. The carnival feels too datey for how fragile this is and they don't really want to surround Gary by people this early on. Despite this really initially being Gary's idea with a lot of interference from Petey, Gary is tucking himself in the corner of the booth looking very unhappy.

"Do you even like guys?" Jimmy harasses him after Gary fails to participate in the conversation in the entire ten minutes they've been there.

"Girls are harpies," Gary answer, side-eying Jimmy.

"What does that even mean?" Jimmy demands, annoyed at Gary's ability to answer questions without offering any useful information.

"I don't need the type of girls that would like me. I don't need psychotic mindless little followers lining up to conceive my children," Gary elaborates and Jimmy shakes his head.

"So any girl who believes what you preach is psychotic but you're not? Is that what you're saying?" Jimmy argues. Petey sinks into his seat. This isn't going as he wanted it to.

"Who's crazier, the person preaching what he believes or the masses who convince themselves he's right?" Gary counters.

"What does that make us then?" Jimmy asks, challenging Gary to say anything that they won't find insulting. Against Jimmy's better judgement, he's come to give somewhat of a fuck about Gary but he's not Petey. He can't run into something with some crazy motherfucker just because the alternatives aren't promising. Gary rolls his eyes and turns his body so that he's facing Jimmy rather than the booth wall.

"Listen, the way I figure it, you either hurt other people or you self-destruct," Gary says rather than answering.

"I don't want to hurt other people," Jimmy responds stiffly. Gary grins and it reminds Jimmy of freshman year. It reminds Jimmy of meeting Gary and trusting Gary despite everything in his body telling him not to.

"Well then, Hopkins, let's self-destruct together," Gary offers, sending a small smile to Pete.

And fuck Jimmy because that makes more sense than anything anyone's said to him in forever. Jimmy's spent so long trying to keep himself together and to play that guy who helps himself without burning any bridges. It's never occurred to him to just stop and let things fall apart as they will. Jimmy's not Gary but he's fucked up in his own way; it might be nice to embrace that in a way only Gary's ever done.

"Yeah, okay. Let's do that," Jimmy concedes.

The date is a hell of a lot more pleasant after that and not a single one of them stops smiling the entire time. Even Gary. If this is what it means to self-destruct together, Petey has no regrets.


End file.
